littlebattles: (humans are b-b-bad to the bone)
June Harris | "Dr. Zoe Smith" ([personal profile] littlebattles) wrote2020-05-05 12:31 am
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pairing information

Character Name: June Harris
Character Journal: [personal profile] littlebattles
Status: Inmate
Pairing Information:
June is a willing inmate, and will actually be pretty open to the idea of graduation from the get-go. She genuinely does want a fresh start in life, which is why she stole her sister's identity and got herself aboard a colony ship headed off-planet - but ultimately, she won't be married to that particular path, and will be totally fine with switching tactics and taking fresh-start-via-Barge instead. Hell, she'll even like the Barge option better; it'll mean that after graduation, she can go to another universe entirely, where it would be practically impossible for any of her old baggage to follow her.

But all that said, there’s a big difference between being down for the idea of graduating, and actually changing her mindset enough to graduate - and getting to the latter point is going to take some time. At first, she'll be in denial about what graduation will entail, believing that she'll be able to get herself there simply by being a nice, friendly, productive member of the Barge, even as she's simultaneously lying to and attempting to manipulate everyone else onboard. At least one person knowing the full truth about her will be essential to her graduation - without that, she'll be happy to keep up the lie forever. Because of this, she 100% needs a warden who will read her file. She'll ask them not to, and she'll make very reasonable arguments as to why they shouldn't; she'll point out that there are wardens onboard who never read their inmates' files without permission, and those wardens have graduated people just fine. A warden who would be inclined to agree with her on this front will, unfortunately, get absolutely nowhere with her.

Berating her about the shit she's pulled and forcing her to acknowledge that she is not the good person she thinks she is is something that absolutely should happen, but a good warden for her will be able to recognize the times when she's not as bad as she could be - and they'll also be able to recognize that those times won't necessarily be the most obvious ones. If asked to pinpoint moments of human decency in her past, she'd happily point out the way she pitched in to help the group after the colonists' first crash landing, or the time she rescued a dude while he was stranded, or the way she offered to use her sailing experience to try to get a boat safely through a violent storm, but those are cop-out answers that she shouldn't be allowed to get away with; they completely gloss over the fact that her own self-interest (gaining the favor of others so that they'd vouch for her, saving her own ass, etc.) was at the forefront of all those efforts. The way she gets upset anytime she's reminded of the time she willingly let a man be sucked out an airlock, on the other hand, is something she wouldn't even think to mention, but is absolutely something her warden should seize on. What really needs to happen is for her to realize that that man is no different from every other person who's suffered by her hands, either directly or indirectly. Coming to terms with this will be an incredibly distressing experience for her, but it'll be a necessary one.

She's going to need a warden who has a decent bullshit detector, and who is comfortable navigating a relationship with someone who's highly manipulative; that said, someone who automatically assumes the worst of her and never gives her the benefit of the doubt won't do her much good in the long run. Part of the reason she's dug herself so deep into this pit of crime, lies, and more crime is because she believes that no one would like her, trust her, or give her a second chance if they knew the whole, unvarnished truth about who she is and what she's done. She needs someone who will prove her wrong on that front, while at the same time refusing to let her make excuses for herself.

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